In this moment, in these three days, I felt at peace, I felt in the moment, I felt worthy, and I felt connected. The moment we stepped off the plane on Tuesday night and walked into the airport in Albuquerque, I knew I was in a place of peace. The buildings were different, the airport was smaller, and nature surrounded me. As we were driving, we could see the mountains peaking through, and as I walked down the sidewalks, I saw the mountains looking at me and me looking at them.
As we stepped on the campus of UNM, something amazing happened, and I was surrounded by my people. I was being hugged on all sides by indigenous college students, and I saw signs on several buildings saying "Native American Services." For once, I knew what my fellow students who do not identify as white felt like as they walked on the campus of TCU. I felt a connection to the campus, nature, the people, and the mountains that constantly surrounded us. This feeling of awe cannot be put into words. It was pure bliss!
Although we were at the conference to present research, it was almost like time had stopped. I was able to slow down and be present! I was able to take my time and be present when the flamenco dancers danced during our cultural experience, as we broke bread with college students from around the world, and as we took the tram on Sandia Mountain. There was a lot happening here in Texas for me, and there were so many assignments due and meetings to be had, but one thing that nature, New Mexico, and the culture allowed me to do was connect and be mindful. I needed this peace. I needed this break! A piece of Albuquerque will remain in me forever.
The stories I heard of the tragic events that happen on Native reservations and in the streets of Albuquerque due to drugs and crime pulled on my social worker heart, and all I could do was pray for resources for those in need. The governor and tour guide said, "Welcome to New Mexico, the land of enchantment," and when I had conversations with the locals and Uber drivers, I was made aware of the truth that mixes with this land. These conversations needed to happen as they helped my research and allowed me to want to explore New Mexico in many other ways.
Finding out about the excursion made me so nervous because I am scared of heights. I also thought of the amazing pictures I would get of nature, but the nerves were still present. But my friend was going to do it; everyone was going to do it, so I knew I could not let this moment pass me by. So, anxious and all, I boarded the tram for a ride across Albuquerque to Sandia Mountain, and I looked below me, around me, and up in the sky, and I could not be more grateful that I had this opportunity. We were 10,000 feet above sea level and 4,000 feet above ground! It was the most freeing and magical experience I had in nature. I overcame my fear and took the leap into the unknown, into the wild, and I was so proud of myself. Not only did we get to ride the tram, but we got to be one with the land. I stopped on the edge of the mountain, paused, and took a few breaths. I was in the moment, in this space with God and nature, and nothing else mattered. I stood in that moment as the cool air ran across my face and body, and I knew that moment would change me forever.
After our time in the mountains, I was able to continue to explore the outdoors, and with each breath, I was grateful for the ability to be in this space.
The day of my oral presentation I was practicing, and I looked up from my chair, and I had the most beautiful image, and I prayed! I became calm and one with the moment. I let my worries go! I walked into the room to present, and I carried this image of the beautiful stucco buildings and mountains staring at me. I delivered my presentation on emerging adult mental health, and I received amazing support from some incredible humans. I finished this day with gratitude, and I left with lasting connections and conversations that changed my life.
Our final morning, we visited Old Town for an amazing breakfast, a walk in the city, and a visit to the first church built. I heard amazing music and felt the wind across my face yet again. We enjoyed each moment as we stepped away from the computers, busy schedules, and distractions of our phones to be present. As we packed our bags and headed to the airport to board our plane, I knew the beauty of New Mexico had changed me. The culture, people, nature, calmness, and connection I had to the land were experiences that I will carry forever. It is an honor to have said yes to Albuquerque, New Mexico. I am grateful for the opportunity from McNair. Thank you, God, for reconnecting me to the world around me.
Until next time!
~Autumn Rae
Thanks for this lovely blog post. It is both meditation and description, a nice balance between the two. The photos were really great. You reveal how powerful this visit was on you with considerable feeling. I enjoyed reading this.
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